WSU Newsline: First years of a marriage may decide its outcome
Jul 16, 2008 2:06 PM | Print
The scripts are available for printing and for sound bite identification.
Summer is a popular time for weddings but, after the honeymoon, life doesn't always go as smoothly as newlyweds hope. As the topic of matrimonial success and divorce is studied more and more, research is showing that how a couple weathers their first two years together can make or break a marriage. Wichita State University sociologist Jodie Hertzog talks about challenges facing newlyweds on today's Newsline.
Announcer: The first year of marriage can be exciting, but it also can be a learning experience. Many newlyweds are surprised when conflicts arise after the honeymoon, according to Jodie Hertzog, a sociologist at Wichita State University.
Hertzog: "Many newlyweds are surprised when conflicts arise early on in the relationship because they're focused on love, and the new aspects of the relationship versus the work that's involved. So, after the honeymoon, the work sets in."
Announcer: Hertzog says good communication is the key to maintaining a relationship and it's something you have to work on, and learn how to listen and hear what the underlying issues are. This is Joe Kleinsasser at Wichita State University.
Sound bite #1
Hertzog explains the common issues that newlyweds need to address. The sound bite is 6 seconds and the outcue is "and finances."
Hertzog: "Some of the issues are establishing roles, the division of labor and finances."
Sound bite #2
Hertzog says opposites may attract, but some of those opposites can become a source of conflict. The sound bite is 15 seconds and the outcue is "later on."
Hertzog: "There's some truth to the idea that opposites may attract, but in the living out of the relationship the problems arise — things that you thought were cute in the early dating phase are things that become the issues of the relationship later on."
Sound bite #3
Hertzog says good communication is important when conflicts arise. The sound bite is 12 seconds and the outcue is "underlying issues are."
Hertzog: "Communication is something that's important throughout the relationship. It's actually the key to maintaining a relationship, and it's something that you have to work on and learn how to really listen and hear what the underlying issues are."
Sound bite #4
Hertzog says that underlying issues often exist. The sound bite is 19 seconds and the outcue is "taken for granted."
Hertzog: "A lot of times underlying issues exist. For instance, you put the toilet paper roll on one way, your partner does it another way. When they change it they don't take your way into account. Underlying that issue really might be something else, such as, you're not feeling heard, not feeling appreciated, being taken for granted."
Sound bite #5
Hertzog says relationships don't exist in a vacuum. The sound bite is 15 seconds and the outcue is "our relationship."
Hertzog: "Relationships don't exist in a vacuum. We have pre-existing expectations from how we are raised. Our family, our friends, all have ideas about what a good relationship is, and sometimes those influence the way that we're perceiving our relationship."
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